our adoption story

November is wrapping up with the Christmas season upon us.  The snow has fallen a few times in Saskatchewan, and the christmas trees lights are popping up!  But before we say goodbye to November and adoption awareness month, I thought I should get one more blog post in.

This year we had the opportunity to share our adoption story with our church family on Orphan Sunday.   So here is what we shared that morning.

As many of you know my husband Ryan and I adopted our little girl through His Hands in Taiwan.   Grace is 1 year old and the light of our life!

Our adoption journey started long before we ever filled out an application form or met with a social worker.  God had a plan for us long before we ever knew.

When I was a young girl God planted a seed in my heart of love for orphans and kids around the world in need.  Fast forward a few years and God brought into my life my best friend and life partner.  When Ryan and I started talking about marriage and the future we discussed adoption and the importance of doing whatever we could to help orphan children.

Shortly after we were married we entered an unexpected season of our lives.  We were crying out to God for direction for the future when He made it very clear that we were called to grow our family through adoption.

I was ready right away to fill out the forms and commit to a country and get the adoption process started.  However, even though we knew this was God’s plan, He was asking us to wait for His perfect timing.  I remember being frustrated and saying to God “ You have showed us this is your plan for our family, it says in the bible that we are supposed to take care of the orphan and the widow, giving a child a home is a good thing…. Why do I have to wait?”  I look back now and see how God used that time in my life to teach me and mould me, to deepen my relationship with Him, to knit our relationship closer together as Husband and Wife.  At the time I had no idea how vital this would be as we entered the adoption process.

A while later Ryan and I felt like it was time to start filling out applications forms and figuring out where to adopt.  We looked into many different programs and countries and were praying for direction.  One Sunday morning I was feeling discouraged as I grabbed a seat near the back of the church.  I said a quick prayer for peace as the service started.  That morning there was a special skype call with Holly and Regan Muir discussing an organization called His Hands.  We had heard of His Hands in passing through the church but this was the 1^st time we had an opportunity to hear more in depth about the ministry.  After the skype call I said a quick prayer for His Hands and then God rocked my world.

I felt it in the core of my soul that God was promising that someday we would adopt a little girl from Taiwan.

We were so excited about working with His Hands and immediately felt a peace about this direction.  However when we discussed with people why we chose His Hands I usually left out the little part about God promising us a girl.  Ryan and I would have been over the moon if our baby had been either a boy or a girl, and I often reasoned that a baby either way was good enough, that was a pretty specific promise, and I pushed the little girl part to the back of my mind.  When I opened the email for Grace almost 2 years later God strongly reminded me in that moment that He is faithful to do what He says He will do, even in the  little details.

I would love to say that it was smooth sailing from that Sunday morning on, but there were so many bumps in the road, you would have thought we were on a Saskatchewan Highway.

But God was FAITHFUL!

We emailed His Hands to start the application process but they were not taking applications at that time.  We continued to pray and believe that this was God’s plan and when it was His Time we received an application in our email inbox… Totally 100% all God’s doing!

We hit brick wall after brick wall with social services but God used that to build character in our lives and to remind us every day that He is in control.

He faithfully provided a Christian woman to do our home study and education process.  We had called 8 social workers she was the only one to return our call, that was 100% God’s doing!

He provided all of the finances for the adoption expenses even when unexpected bills popped up.

He provided workplaces for both Ryan and I that were incredibly understanding and generous with the time off we needed to complete the adoption process.

He provided me with a prayer warrior that checked in often and who would email me to encourage me

He provided a wonderful woman of God who mentored me and loved me, who prayed with me each week, who encouraged me beyond words

He provided the wonderful team at His Hands who loved Grace, lavished her with Hugs and Kisses, who prayed for her, and took care of every one of her needs until we could be there.

He provided us friends and family who encouraged us, celebrated with us, and gave us a hug when all we could do was weep. 

And when our hearts were breaking and we were so tired from the struggle and waiting for things to move along in the process, He provided us a church family to pray for us and encourage us.  Your prayers blessed us. 

God was faithful to provide for every single one of our needs through our adoption process.  On July 10, 2012 we held our beautiful baby girl for the 1^st time in a train station in Kaohsiung Taiwan.

I was reminded of these words that day

“ I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Joshua 1:5 Hebrews 13:5)

“ For I know the plans I have for you says the Lord, “ Jeremiah 29:11

Blessings!

Orphan Sunday

4 years ago my cousin called me to ask if I was watching the telecast online for Orphan Sunday.  I had no idea that there was such a thing, so I quickly got on the computer to watch.  

That was my first Orphan Sunday. Every year since I look forward to the first Sunday in November where people around the world take time to remember the plight of the Orphans, to get people talking about Orphans and orphan care and to commit to making a change. 

For more information about Orphan Sunday check out the Christian Alliance for Orphans website at:

http://orphansunday.org/

My 1st orphan sunday was sitting on the couch with the computer on my lap, texting my cousin and discussing our dreams of adoption. After reading and finding out all this information about Orphan Sunday I dreamed about someday being able to be at a live Orphan Sunday event.  4 years later and I had the privilege and honor of being part of the 1st Orphan Sunday at our church.  All the plans that I had dreamed of for the last few years didn't even come close to how special the celebration was today. 

I have enjoyed reading friends adoption stories and sharing in the excitement that Orphan Sunday has brought to those who care about Orphans.  

Please stop and pray for a child waiting for a forever family or an organization that is doing their best to take care of orphan child, or an adoptive family waiting for the paperwork to go through.

Blessings,

The day our life changed

One year ago this picture showed up in the inbox of my email.

When I stop to think of the moment our life changed I can see everything so clearly like it was just moments ago.  I remember the feeling of excitement, awe, wonder, and overwhelming sense of love....

For those of you who have never heard our referral story... here is a tiny bit of one of the most amazing days...
Ryan was home sick for the day and received a phone call from Social Services in Saskatchewan.  They asked him a few cryptic questions and then finally announced that we had received a referral for a little girl.  They gave him a few details and said that they would be sending the email with the referral right then along with a few forms that we needed to fill out etc... Ryan then proceeds to call me at work, it was a crazy busy morning, and I actually missed the first phone call, but when the phone rang right away again I jumped to grab it... and the compassionate wife that I am when I heard his voice I asked if I could call him back when I had a few minutes, but he said no, he then told me the great news and told me to go to the computer to read the referral.  I dropped everything ran to the back office and closed the door,  put the phone on speaker and started sobbing as I waited for the email to load on the slowest computer system in the world.  Needless to say, my coworker saw the commotion and came to check on me, and then was incredibly worried as she saw me on the floor sobbing, and laughing!!!! I quickly explained the situation and she sent me home for the day ( I do have incredible coworkers and workplace that were extremely flexible with all the appointments required for the adoption).  I raced home to celebrate with Ryan, I asked a million questions about the phone call, we re read the referral a million times and we stopped and prayed.  We thanked God for His amazing plan, for this beautiful life He created, for peace and love to wrap around this situation for the birth family, and then we asked for wisdom and for God's will.   We spent the rest of the day contacting family and friends, filling out forms, picking out names, and crying and laughing. 

I remember the feeling, of seeing this little life, and knowing that she was my daughter.  There were so many emotions that day!

Many people ask how much of a surprise the referral was, if we knew we were going to receive the referral soon,  if we knew the gender of the child etc. ???? We were completely surprised by everything.  We had waited a long time for a referral, but I have learned when you are waiting every day seems like forever, we were trusting in God's timing and we were very aware that the wait could be a lot longer.  We did have the option of  stating on our application forms wether we wanted a boy or a girl but we both felt very strongly when we first started this process that God would place the child he intended to be in our family in our home in his timing, so we were completely surprised by the beautiful picture of the little girl who was born a few days earlier.

It seems like a lifetime ago that our world was changed, but the memory is still so clear.   We are so blessed to be celebrating our referral day at home WITH Grace this year.  I am excited to celebrate for years to come with Grace and take the time to remember this amazing day!

What a year it has been!

Blessings!

Questions

One of the things we have encountered since we have been home is lots of questions.  We are happy to answer your questions and hope that you always feel comfortable asking. However in my sleep deprived state I am not always the most eloquent, and this my attempt to give you some real answers other than "yes" "no" or " Grace is great, thanks"

1.  Does Grace speak Chinese?  or Does Grace understand english?

    My witty Husband will tell you that Grace says Dadda in english but says Momma in Taiwaneese ( she is actually saying Dadda and to Ryan especial when she is mad at me, but has yet to give me a name).   In all honesty I have no idea if Grace is speaking Chinese, Taiwaneese or English.  She has been exposed to many languages.  I do know she recognizes when someone is speaking Chineese to her, but I do not know if she understands.  She does understand english as she is very aware of what "NO" means, "take that out of your mouth" and "Grace"

2.  Has Grace adjusted? Is she bonded?

    Grace has begun the bonding process.  She knows who her Mommy and Daddy are and when she is home.  She has got over jet lag, and I believe she is starting to adjust to this new life we have thrust her into.  Ryan and I are still very careful to let Grace process the new situations she is in.  We have asked that people respectfully not pick her up, especially in environments with lots of people as this is quite uncomfortable for Grace.  In the last couple of weeks Grace has started to act a little bit shy and curl into my arms, when she meets someone new.  This is a great sign that she is understanding that I am her mommy and she does not have to go to just anyone.  We know that the bonding process will be ongoing.  We are still not ready or comfortable leaving Grace with anyone just yet, she understands that if I leave a room I will come back, but I am not ready to trial if I leave her with someone else that she will understand that I am coming back. 

3.  Grace doesn't look "Asian" why is her skin so dark?

     Grace's heritage is Native Taiwaneese.   Her skin color and features reflect her heritage.   I am thankful that Grace is happy and healthy and of course I think she is incredibly beautiful.  

4.  So how did you pick Grace?

    We did not "pick"Grace.  The wonderful team at His Hands picked us for Grace.  They prayed for wisdom on who God wanted to raise this little girl, and we were chosen off of the waiting list for Grace.

5.  Have you started your next adoption?

    No we have not.  

Well why not it took you 2 years for this adoption whats the wait? 

  There a few reasons why we have not started the process for the next adoption. We still have some paperwork that we need to finish up for Grace.  (We have had to apply for her Saskatchewan Health Card, and now are in the process of changing Grace's name, once that is complete we need to tackle citizenship. )  Adoption takes a lot of mental, emotional and physical time, even in the very early stages. We want to focus on  enjoying this moment with Grace and celebrating each day with her.  If we choose to do international adoption again there is a significant cost, this is something we will have to consider before we start the process as we need to have the finances in place for each stage.  We do hope to expand our family again, and we are aware that adoption can be a very lengthly process, however we are trusting and relying on God for his guidance and wisdom.  When we feel His leading we will gladly start the adoption process for whatever country He has in store. 

6. What do you know about Grace's biological parents?

   We are blessed to know a little bit about Grace's story.  This is something we have chosen to tell Grace when is ready and wants to know.  If she choses to share her story with others at that time we will support her.  However I am very aware that this is not my story to tell, this is Grace's and she needs to be the one to share the information.  I hope I have not offended anyone who has asked me this question.  I am working very hard to give NO information, it is not that I do not trust you, or  that I am ashamed, I truly believe that it is important for Grace to be able to share this information if and when she chooses... again this is not my story to tell.  One thing I am working on is doing a scrapbook, with that information for her, so that I do not forget any of it, and when she is ready we can go through the pages and talk about it ( this is not an easy thing, as I am NOT a scrapbooker) 

7.  Do you like being a Mommy?

   Yes I do like being a Mom.  I am the first one to tell you that my days are not perfect.  I do not wake up looking like a million bucks and smelling like roses.  Usually I am stumbling out of bed because my daughter is unhappy and crying.  My days are chaotic and my house is a disaster.  However I love the feeling of making Grace laugh, I like learning what she finds silly.  I love watching her smile and get excited when someone special walks through the door.  I am in awe of the responsibility before me as I rock her to sleep at 3am after she has had a little snack.  I am proud when I see that she has mastered how to climb onto something  even though she shouldn't be there.  I laugh when she pinches me, because I am not feeding her fast enough.  I smirk at the look I get when I catch her in the act of doing something naughty ( cleaning the toilet with mommies tooth brush, licking all the rocks that she has taken out of the bamboo plant)   I have been surprised by this questions... maybe I didnt seem like stay at home mom material?  Maybe people are worried about me and checking in to make sure I am not checking on the return policy for this child?  Being a mom is a gift, one that I will not take for granted.... I am so blessed to have a sleeping angel on my lap right now.  

There has been many other questions and I hope there are more to come, but for now I hope this give you some answers to the most common questions we have been answering.  

sleeping beauty

sticky messy popsicle

Blessings!

Home

Its been 5 weeks since we arrived home, and wow the time has flown by!  I often think of our neglected blog, but the pitter patter of little feet remind me there is no time to sit down and write, there is a little girl climbing on something, or putting something in her mouth that doesn't belong there.

That sweet little girl is occupied beside me with her breakfast, so I am going to attempt to write a quick update on our life as a family of 3!

The last month at home has been a whirlwind.  We have been blessed to have seen so many of our family the last month.  Grace has been able to meet many of her grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins.  We were blessed with 3 baby showers that filled Grace's closet with enough clothes till she goes to Kindergarten! We have taken a couple of quick trips out of town for a multitude of reasons, all of which include great memories!  This past weekend we finally had the opportunity to celebrate a new milestone in Mom's life.  We were blessed to be surrounded by family and friends for the weekend, and what sweet memories we have from our time with everyone!  

Along with all of our fun, we have the day to day adjustments.  This has not been as smooth of a process.  We survived jet lag, got over our colds from the airplane, the change in climate ( our poor little girl.... even our summers are nothing compared Taiwan).  We are learning to survive with a lot less sleep, teething ( OUCH) eating, getting dressed everyday (boy oh boy that can be hard somedays)... I am sure you get the picture.

I had a few expectations buried in the back of my mind about how life would be like when we got home.  I was going to be super mom, have a meal on the table, laundry folded and put away and floors scrubbed each day.  Not to mention my daughter would sleep through the night, I would be up before her have exercised and done my devotions before she even started to stir for the day.... 

I had no idea I had so many expectations until I was home and realized I was not meeting a single one of them.  It occurred to me after a couple of sleepless nights that my life was not going to be picture perfect.  I was going to be the mom with huge bags under her eyes, who was lucky to get a shower in that week ( am I wearing deodorant????? ) Supper???? are you kidding!?!?! 

Thankfully I have been able to slowly work through the expectations I have placed on myself and have been enjoying each crazy moment with our little energizer bunny!  Our house may not be clean, but Grace has been fed, played with, sung to, read to, redirected from the toilet paper, gone for a walk or wagon ride and begged to just close her eyes for a couple of minutes of sleep.  I am currently trying for the world record of quickest shower, and I do believe that I will get there someday soon!  

I feel like we are finally settling into life at home,  I can not remember what the house sounded like without Grace in it.  Our little girl is 10 months old!  She takes a couple more steps everyday, but still prefers to have something to hang onto when she walks.  She has 5 teeth and 2 more that keep playing peekaboo (ARGGGGG)  she needs the least amount of sleep of anyone I have ever met.  She is very happy, and very chatty.  She likes to smile and her laugh is music to the soul.  She loves to make noise, and you can often find her at the piano on her tip toes to stretch and play the keys.  She is tough and rough, Grace's first big word just might be "gentle".

Thank you to everyone who has been praying for us, and encouraging us!  We have been blessed with so much support and help from our family!  We are so blessed to be surrounded by such wonderful people!

playing with Willy early in the morning

just back from a wagon ride

swimming in Grandma and Grandpa's pool

Blessings!

so long for now....

This is not goodbye... just so long.....

turn that frown upside down... how can you not smile looking at this face?

We have had an incredible time in Taiwan!  We have many wonderful memories of our adventures here, the sounds, smells, sights.... There are so many stories to be told!

clouds rolling over the hills on our walk the other morning

While we are so excited to be going home, and introducing Grace to her family and friends it is hard to say goodbye to the wonderful people who have shown their love in such amazing ways!  

view of the mall

There are some very special people who love Grace so much!  It is hard to say goodbye today.  

Thankfully this is not goodbye, just so long for now! 

now on to our next big adventure.... life at home in Canada as a family of 3!

We love you all!

My Blessing

Today Grace you are 9 months old and I must say today is extra special to me, because this morning I woke up very early with you, and watched you smile as I walked into your room to get you out of your crib.  My heart soars every time I make you laugh or make your whole face scrunch up in a smile, and I feel a sense of pride when you get mad at me when you feel like I am stopping you from accomplishing your goal ( like climbing the couch by yourself).

  Grace you are our blessing.  We do not deserve the opportunity to be your parents, but by God's amazing love and His grace, he blessed us with the opportunity to love you and care for you!  If someone asked me 5 years ago what my life would look like at this moment I could have never imagined that I would be waking up in Taiwan listening to your sweet voice welcoming the new day.  God is writing the story for our family and it is so beautiful.... never easy....but beautiful.

Love you always,

Mommy and Daddy

Mommy and Grace ready to go out for the day

trip to Sandeeman 

sleeping after a long morning of playing

not quiet ready to go to bed

walking along the furniture